Comments on: 101 Things Not To Say During Sex http://www.funtasticus.com/2008/03/21/101-things-not-to-say-during-sex/ Funtasticus.com provides the best entertainment on the web. Daily issues with jokes, humor, videos, pictures and much more! Dont miss out! Sat, 21 Nov 2009 14:12:44 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: moshe rabeynu http://www.funtasticus.com/2008/03/21/101-things-not-to-say-during-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-15325 moshe rabeynu Sat, 21 Mar 2009 22:30:48 +0000 http://funtasticus.com/20080321/101-things-not-to-say-during-sex/#comment-15325 STUDENTS MUST BE INCULCATED AS TO THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION. MODERN LIFESTYLES AFFORD INDIVIDUALS THE PRIVACY AND HYGIENIC FACILITIES NECESSARY TO MASTURBATE IN A PRIVATE, DIGNIFIED AND SANITARY MANNER. ONE CAN WELL UNDERSTAND THE IRE THAT WAS AROUSED BY MASTURBATING INDIVIDUALS FOUR THOUSAND YEARS AGO WHEN AN ENTIRE LARGE FAMILY LIVED TOGETHER IN A TENT IN AN ARID LOCATION. NOBODY WANTED TO HAVE A WAD OF FLYING GISSUM HIT THEM IN THE EYE OR LAND IN THEIR HUMUUS. WATER WAS SCARCE AND ONE HAD TO WALK TO THE WELL TO GET IT, IF IT WAS AVAILABLE. UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES IT WAS A CHOICE OF WATER FOR DRINKING OR WATER FOR WASHING EJACULATE OFF OF ONE’S HANDS. THIS IS WHY THE EARLY SAGES WERE SO VOCIFEROUS IN THEIR CONDEMNATION OF MASTURBATION. WE JEWISH PEOPLE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A HORNY BUNCH AND, IF THERE WEREN'T THESE SEVERE STRICTURES AGAINST MASTURBATION AT THAT TIME, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN ERRANT CUMSTAINS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND THE SMELL OF FRESHLY RELEASED GISSUM WOULD HAVE WAFTED FAR AND WIDE. TIMES HAVE CHANGED.. IF PARENTS TODAY STRESS THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION TO THEIR CHILDREN, THEY WILL HELP LESSEN THE OCCURRENCE OF STDs, AND UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES. IF NECESSARY, PARENTS SHOULD SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THEIR CHILDREN ON THE PROPER METHODOLOGY FOR THIS ACTIVITY AND FOLLOW UP AND MAKE SURE THAT THEIR CHILDREN ARE MASTURBATING REGULARLY AT AN OPTIMUM FREQUENCY. KEEPING A MASTURBATION DIARY COULD BE A VERY USEFUL TOOL IN MAINTAINING THE PROPER SCHEDULE. EVERY PARENT SHOULD ASK HIS CHILDREN, "DID YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK AND MASTURBATE TODAY?" STUDENTS MUST BE INCULCATED AS TO THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION. MODERN LIFESTYLES AFFORD INDIVIDUALS THE PRIVACY AND HYGIENIC FACILITIES NECESSARY TO MASTURBATE IN A PRIVATE, DIGNIFIED AND SANITARY MANNER. ONE CAN WELL UNDERSTAND THE IRE THAT WAS AROUSED BY MASTURBATING INDIVIDUALS FOUR THOUSAND YEARS AGO WHEN AN ENTIRE LARGE FAMILY LIVED TOGETHER IN A TENT IN AN ARID LOCATION. NOBODY WANTED TO HAVE A WAD OF FLYING GISSUM HIT THEM IN THE EYE OR LAND IN THEIR HUMUUS. WATER WAS SCARCE AND ONE HAD TO WALK TO THE WELL TO GET IT, IF IT WAS AVAILABLE. UNDER THESE CIRCUMSTANCES IT WAS A CHOICE OF WATER FOR DRINKING OR WATER FOR WASHING EJACULATE OFF OF ONE’S HANDS. THIS IS WHY THE EARLY SAGES WERE SO VOCIFEROUS IN THEIR CONDEMNATION OF MASTURBATION. WE JEWISH PEOPLE HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A HORNY BUNCH AND, IF THERE WEREN’T THESE SEVERE STRICTURES AGAINST MASTURBATION AT THAT TIME, THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN ERRANT CUMSTAINS ALL OVER THE PLACE AND THE SMELL OF FRESHLY RELEASED GISSUM WOULD HAVE WAFTED FAR AND WIDE. TIMES HAVE CHANGED.. IF PARENTS TODAY STRESS THE BENEFITS OF MASTURBATION TO THEIR CHILDREN, THEY WILL HELP LESSEN THE OCCURRENCE OF STDs, AND UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES. IF NECESSARY, PARENTS SHOULD SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THEIR CHILDREN ON THE PROPER METHODOLOGY FOR THIS ACTIVITY AND FOLLOW UP AND MAKE SURE THAT THEIR CHILDREN ARE MASTURBATING REGULARLY AT AN OPTIMUM FREQUENCY. KEEPING A MASTURBATION DIARY COULD BE A VERY USEFUL TOOL IN MAINTAINING THE PROPER SCHEDULE. EVERY PARENT SHOULD ASK HIS CHILDREN, “DID YOU DO YOUR HOMEWORK AND MASTURBATE TODAY?”

]]> By: moshe rabeynu http://www.funtasticus.com/2008/03/21/101-things-not-to-say-during-sex/comment-page-1/#comment-15312 moshe rabeynu Sat, 21 Mar 2009 15:44:22 +0000 http://funtasticus.com/20080321/101-things-not-to-say-during-sex/#comment-15312 "You really ought to shave that thing!" "Is it in yet?" "gammarnu!" "Have you ever done it the Grecian way?" "Let's do it the Hassidic way and cut a whole in the blanket!" "Hey, where did that strap-on come from?" “You really ought to shave that thing!”

“Is it in yet?”

“gammarnu!”

“Have you ever done it the Grecian way?”

“Let’s do it the Hassidic way and cut a whole in the blanket!”

“Hey, where did that strap-on come from?”

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