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50 Things Men Should Know About Women… But Don’t?

August 11th, 2008

I thought it only fair that since we had an article on what women should know, we should have one on what men should know by now. For all the girls reading our blog, enjoy this.

1. Saying “I love you” immediately before, during, or following sex doesn’t count.

2. Real men drive stick shift.

3. I will leave if you lie.

4. You are cute in raglan-sleeved T-shirts (two-toned baseball undershirts).

5. I’m convinced I’m pregnant and obsess about it for a minimum of 24 to 48 hours before my period, even when I have no rational reason to think so.

6. I love it when you hug me from behind and whisper in my ear.

7. “Fine” is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.

8. Most of the time when I fantasize, it’s about you.

9. I’m terrified of becoming my mother, even though I admire her.

10. I get turned on simply seeing that I have an e-mail from you.


11. I expect you to call me.

12. Only rock stars are allowed to wear leather pants.

13. I’m scared of losing my independence.

14. I’m more forgiving of you than I really should be.

15. Oral sex is your get-out-of-the-doghouse-free card. Manolo Blahnik shoes also do the trick.

16. You did something bad. I seem cool with it. I’m not. (See directly above.)

17. If I’m not having sex with you, I’m… a.) …having a fat day. b.) …not feeling “connected” to you. c.) …blackmailing you to get something I want.

18. Shoes determine whether you’re fashionable or not.

19. I own a Debbie Gibson CD, and I’m not afraid to use it.

20. When I compare my flabby tummy to a kangaroo pouch, say nothing.

21. A man I love plans the occasional fancy-schmancy dress-up date and impromptu weekend getaways, and he buys my favorite candy in advance when we’re just going to the movies.

22. You look hot in hooded clothing items.

23. You should never tell me what to do.

24. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.

25. My breasts love much licking and sucking.

26. If you ask me out directly, I will say yes.

27. I’m very impressed when you ask for my advice.

28. I’m unimpressed with a man who doesn’t take the lead.

29. When in doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

30. I want to be Madonna.

31. Women get urinary-tract infections easily, so watch (and wash) your fingers.

32. I’m in heaven when you hold my hand.

33. You’re sexy when you’re shaving, fixing things, wearing a white T-shirt and jeans, driving, eating a peach, holding a baby.

34. I need to hear how you feel about me. Often. Tell me now.

35. Surprises, especially gifts for moi = more loving.

36. I want to be the best thing that ever happened to you–and for you to recognize this.

37. If I’m not feeling loved, I will start looking….

38. Discussion of ex-gf’s and ex-bf’s should be avoided at all times.

39. I like it when you tell me what you’re thinking, even if you don’t know yourself.

40. Celebrating our anniversary, even if it’s only been a few months, earns major bonus points.

41. I love it when you’re sweaty.

42. It’s best to consult your gal pals for gift ideas.

43. A lady should always be greeted with kisses.

44. I like porn.

45. I love holding your bum in the palms of my hands.

46. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

47. It’s cheating as soon as you’re doing something with her that you wouldn’t want me to see, hear, read…

48. For the record: I’d rather you break up with me than cheat.

49. I remember everything about our relationship.

50. You should know all this and more without my telling you.


Related Posts

  • Why There Aren’t Any ‘Uncle Agonies’
  • 46 Things that Girls Should Know By Now.. But Don’t
  • Friday Wild Girls
  • Desires and Urges
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6 Responses to “50 Things Men Should Know About Women… But Don’t?”

  • Mayor of Kentonville Says: August 11th, 2008 at 6:53 pm

    Number 50 maybe the root of all evil

  • emperour Says: August 11th, 2008 at 8:23 pm

    %0 reasons why women are evil. rotten evil to the core!

  • 3daddict Says: August 11th, 2008 at 10:06 pm

    I hope there’s no test!!

  • f Says: August 12th, 2008 at 5:01 pm

    Lol the the one above :D

  • nick Says: June 28th, 2009 at 7:10 am

    I think that a couple of these are useful. others may not apply to all women but are still good to be aware of. i also think that # 28 conflicts with # 23, and may confuse some guys.

  • lauren Says: August 6th, 2009 at 4:27 pm

    for the most part these are very true…i dont care for madonna though lol. its kinda weird how she expressed exactly how i feel..the whole peach part…man oh man. and the email turn-on..at least is makes my heart jump

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