Men Are Just Happier Creatures

Really really funny. Cool it girls, you may say it’s untrue, we will agree with you even though we still think it’s true.

NICKNAMES

· If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

· If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT

· When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

· When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY

· A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

· A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS

· A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel ..

· The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS

· A woman has the last word in any argument.

· Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE

· A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

· A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS

· A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

· A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE

· A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

· A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING UP

· A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

· A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL

· Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed..

· Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING

· Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

· A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
A man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!


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Filed under: Stories and Jokes



4 Comments

  1. deeplook
    Posted September 12, 2008 at 12:18 pm | Permalink

    just lovely.. :)

  2. andras
    Posted September 15, 2008 at 6:21 am | Permalink

    … true :D

  3. big boy
    Posted September 15, 2008 at 7:01 am | Permalink

    100% true

  4. solomka
    Posted March 4, 2009 at 3:48 pm | Permalink

    hahaha
    this is soooo true

One Trackback

  1. By Homens são criaturas mais felizes « Vida Ordinária on September 15, 2008 at 2:05 pm

    [...] são criaturas mais felizes Encontrei mais esse texto engraçado no Funtastics e não pude evitar de traduzir. Mostra mais algumas diferenças entre nós homens e as [...]

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