I know that these are pretty old but still amuses me every time I read them.

“A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.”

“The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention.”

“I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned the wheel to what I thought was enough and found myself in a different direction going the opposite way.”

“Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don’t have.”

“No one was to blame for the accident, but it never would have happened if the other driver had been alert.”

“The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran over him.”

“I saw the slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the hood of my car.”

“He applied brake and his car stopped, I applied brake and my car didn’t stop.”

“The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.”

“An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my vehicle, and vanished.”

“I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him.”

“To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.”

“When I could not avoid a collision, I stepped on the gas and crashed into the other car.”

“I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.”

“In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.”

“As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the accident.”

“The telephone pole was approaching fast. I was attempting to swerve out of its path when it struck my front end.”