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Humor Archive

Jokes of the Day

A guy walks into a bar with a box. He sits down and starts ordering several drinks. “What’s in the box?” Asks the bartender “Ugh, just get me another drink…? Grumbles the man. Bartender says “show me what’s in the box and the next ones on the house.” The man nods places the box on

Jokes of the Day

An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.” “Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams. “We can’t stand the sight of each other

Some Quick Laughs

I heard a statistic that there are more men named David in charge of companies than there are women. Well obviously. How many women do you know named David? *********************************************************** How do you piss off a female archaeologist? Give her a used tampon and ask her what period it came from. *********************************************************** There’s no reason

Some Quick Laughs

I wonder if Buzz and woody had ever met Andy’s mom’s toys. They probably have the same names ************************************************* What did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? See you next month. ************************************************* I can’t believe my neighbors came to my house at 5:00 AM… …thank god I was already up playing the

Jimmy Kimmel and his Mean Tweets Music Edition

If you watch Jimmy Kimmel you know all about his Mean tweets segment where celebs, musicians, and sport starts read what people on Twitter really feel about them.  Check out how Drake, Lady Gaga, and Britney Spears handled the opinions of anonymous strangers.