The New York Post assembled this great list of the best jokes made by some of the funniest people in the entertainment industry. Enjoy and laugh…. now.

Roseanne

A doctor tells a guy: “I have bad news. You have Alzheimer’s, and you have cancer.” Guy says, “Thank God I don’t have cancer.”

Jackie Mason

Hillary Clinton says she’s the most qualified because she was married to a president for eight years. Now let me ask you, if a brain surgeon quit his job, would everyone in the operating room say, “Wait, let’s get his wife.”

Lisa Lampanelli

I was watching Gene Simmons’ TV show, “Family Jewels.” Or as it’s known in the business, ” ‘The Osbournes’ Without the Talented Father.”

Laura Kightlinger

After miraculously surviving two heart surgeries, pneumonia and a mild stroke, at 82 my grandfather was no longer able to care for himself. Now he lives with my aunt who spoon-feeds him, takes him to the bathroom, etc. Proof that what doesn’t kill you makes you a burden to someone else.

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