The following are supposed REAL answers given on exams by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school (i.e. Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders).

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can’t see my license plate.

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at
the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying,
“Guns don’t kill people. I do.”

Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your
car?
A: Always wear a condom.

Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.

Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too shit-faced to find your keys.

Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk
driving?
A: I’d probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer
drive lawfully? Read the full story »

1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is L. A.

2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00 p.m. Friday’s rush hour starts on Thursday morning.

3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 85 mph. On the 105 or 110, your speed is expected to match the highway number. Anything less is considered “Wussy.”

4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. L A has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, in Malibu, SUV-driving, cellphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.

5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot.

6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It’s another offense that can get you shot.
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Nicola Mclean is a British model born on 16 September 1981. Believe it or not, before she became hot, she was actually an army cadet! Can you see her in army uniform, but not in the way you imagine it I’m sure!

And it is not hard to guess, she has had breast enhancement surgery from 32C to 32G. She is currently engaged to the lucky fella, Tom Williams, Peterborough United football player. Interesting fact about her: She has failed her driving test a whooping 7 times.

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A male and female driver are involved in a horrific collision. As they crawl from the wreckage, the man sees the woman is blonde and beautiful. She turns to him and gushes breathily: “We shouldn’t have survived that. Maybe it’s a sign from God that we’re meant to be together!”
The man stammers back, “Oh yes, I agree completely!”
“And look,” she continues. “Though my car was destroyed, this bottle of wine is intact, too! It’s another sign. Let’s drink to our love!”
“Well, OK!’ says the man. She offers him the bottle, so he downs half and hands it back.
“Your turn,” he says.
“No, thanks,” says the woman, “I think I’ll just wait for the police.”

WISH YOU HAD A BIGGER ONE? - Funny ad where a guy holds his big ‘package’ and catches the attention of a sexy chick on the train. But another guy was not that fortunate.

HOPELESS BOYFRIEND TWIN - It is hard to decide who to shoot when your REAL boyfriend is equally hopeless as his evil twin.

TEACHING ARROGANT SUPERSTAR A LESSON - Not sure what this short film is all about and why Clive Owen will be doing this. But it is hilarious!

Perfect mindless road rage game to get the frustration out of your system. Destroy cars that are in your way by knocking them off the road or gunning them down. You can even upgrade your weapons as you advance in levels. Nice.

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So you think you can drive? Take this driving exam and see how you fare!


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