The following are supposed REAL answers given on exams by the California Department of Transportation’s driving school (i.e. Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders).

Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
A: What for? He can’t see my license plate.

Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at
the same time?
A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying,
“Guns don’t kill people. I do.”

Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your
car?
A: Always wear a condom.

Q: When driving through fog, what should you use?
A: Your car.

Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?
A: Be too shit-faced to find your keys.

Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk
driving?
A: I’d probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer
drive lawfully? Read the full story »

While we know that being truthful is the most important thing when going for an interview, but even your interviewers expect you to lie through your teeth on certain questions. So don’t be a fool. We (including the interviewers) all know what the ‘real’ answers are to our questions, but we do not really want to hear them… really.

Why did you leave your last job?
Real answer: It sucked.
What you should say: I felt my talents and abilities were underutilized.

What are your biggest weaknesses?
Real answer: I can’t concentrate for more than five minutes, hate all forms of authority and tend to fall asleep at my desk.
What you should say: I’m a workaholic. I just don’t know when to put down my work.

You don’t seem to hold on to a job long. Why should we think you’ll stay here any longer than you’ve stayed elsewhere?
Real answer: My employers have always had a hang-up about keeping only competent employees..
Read the full story »

A mother is driving a little girl to her friend’s house for a play date.
“Mommy,” the little girl asks, “how old are you?”

“Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age,” the mother replied.

“It’s not polite.”

“OK”, the little girl says, “How much do you weigh?”

“Now really,” the mother says, “those are personal questions and are really none of your business.”

Undaunted, the little girl asks, “Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?”
Read the full story »