These are apparently real excuse notes written by parents for the teachers. Is it any wonder that our kids seem to be doing worse than the kids from Asia?

* My son is under a doctor’s care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

* Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

* Dear School: Please excuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33.

* Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

* Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.

* John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

* Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.

* Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

* Chris will not be in school cus he has an Read the full story »