Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor…..

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

I went to a bookstore and asked the sales woman,”Where’s the self-help section?” She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

What if there were no hypothetical questions?

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
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MAKING OUT THOUGHTS -- Funny narration of what goes on in a woman’s mind when fooling around with her guy. Might be educational for some of you!

SEXY GOLF -- Sexy camera prank on a golf class where the teacher is groping a hot slutty chick throughout the lesson. What a treat for the guys!

HAD A BAD DAY -- Best compilation of office breakdowns and temper rages with a great soundtrack.

Does a clean house indicate that there is a broken computer in it?

Why is it that, no matter what color of bubble bath you use, the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day when mattresses are NOT on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with the hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message ‘one slice’? How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot?
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